Merry Christmas. Here’s your coal.

The Examination and Trial of Father Christmas,...

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It’s been several years since I got something for Christmas. And I don’t mean “since I got something I wanted”…I mean got ANYTHING AT ALL (outside of last year’s lovely gift of socks and scratch tickets from Mille and Fille.)

True, I told Chef the last 2 years that I didn’t want anything, but here’s a big clue for men out there: sometimes when your wife or girlfriend or female platonic friend roommate says “aww, don’t get me anything”, SOMETIMES she means “go figure it out yourself, meat head. I pick up your underpants and cook you food and raise your children and listen to you complain about your boss ALL YEAR LONG, go get me something that shows that sometimes you pay attention to me.”

I’m just lucky I don’t get coal. (Especially after the picture I posted above…which apparently has something to do with killing Santa.)

So in this season of giving, I’m posting the “things that make me wish Santa still came to visit me” gift list. If I remind you of one of the lovely ladies on your gift list, you’re lucky. Here’s a cheat sheet for you.

If you don’t, then this is pretty much just a list of things that would make me more spoiled than I already am. Sorry 😉

1. This apron from Cupcake Provocateur. Or really, any of her aprons. I’m completely obsessed with aprons, and enamored with hers in particular. All of her patterns are fun and the prints are fabulously retro and I adore it.

The full skirt of this apron is horribly adorable and since I’ve decided my life’s goal (this year) is to get on Martha Stewart‘s show, I would look fabulous in this sassy little number while scheming how to pull off this epic feat.

And I would wear this all year long, because I shun such restrictions as “you can only wear Christmas aprons at Christmas”. Also, Elvis is awesome.

2. Anything from Lucky Cupcake hairclips. Really, ANYTHING from her site. I’m totally obsessed with hair flowers in general, and hers specifically.  I have a ton and a half of uncontrollable hair, and dressing up a ponytail (or whatever you call it when you bunch your hair up and smack a rubber band on it) with one of these bad boys is essential to this momma not feeling like giant wads of something the cat sucked on  (you’re welcome for that visual) when she leaves the house without mascara.

3. A gift certificate to Bake It Pretty. Because I cannot possibly pick just one thing out of the 9.2 million different things (that number is an estimate, BTW) that they have available on the site and I would love every single one of them in my already-well-stocked kitchen.

The “quins” pictured right are just one example of the 8.73 billion things Bake it Pretty carries, and are totally adorable and I’ve been trying to figure out how I would possibly use them…maybe cake pops shaped like cookie sheets with these on them?

4. These nesting bowls (image courtesy of whitneysmith). I’ve been haunting the whitneysmith shop on etsy for some time, and all of her work is gorgeous.

She does some fantastic single-cupcake stands with tiny birds on them…which I also adore and may have to purchase several of for cupcake photo shoots.

But the bowls are my favorite. The whole set would make a fantastic centerpiece with a tea light in the tiniest bowl, or would be fantastic at a dinner party as serving pieces. Either way, they would be a crazy-awesome addition to your kitchen. Or mine. Or both.

5. For those of you following along at home, you know I am completely obsessed with Alice in Wonderland. Obsessed. I also have a thing for cupcakes. (duh.)

And in knowing these things, you would understand why I totally geeked out about this print. I love the look on her face, the cupcake, the “eat me”….everything. LOVE. (the whole shop is pretty amazing….check it out here. The “We’re All Mad Here” print would also fit in our house PERFECTLY.)

I’m trying to convince Chef to let me buy the Alice print right now and he says to “ask Santa”. I’m pretty sure that’s his seasonal version of “no”.

6. More peppermint foot lotion from Right As Rain. (disclaimer: the owner is a friend of mine, and gave me some of her lotion, but did not ask me to do a review.) I walk around in my bare feet a lot. A LOT. If I don’t have to, I won’t wear shoes.

As a result, my feet get pretty manky. At night, before I go to bed, I love scrubbing them with some homemade salt scrub (though Right as Rain has some great sugar scrub too!) and then slathering them with the lotion and putting on some soft socks.

And now Chef doesn’t complain that I’m rubbing all the skin off his legs at night with my sandpapery feet. (But I’m almost out of lotion…..which is why it’s on the list 🙂

7. I don’t wear a lot of jewelry…but I’d make an exception for a few pieces. Anything in this shop would do….but more specifically this piece.

I would find parties to wear this to. I would THROW parties just so I could wear this. I would end up wearing it with yoga pants, because I don’t own fancy clothes, but it would be epic.

8. Here’s another exception to the “I don’t wear jewelry” rule. Pretty sure this necklace is worth throwing a party for as well. It would have to be a fancy party, I think…maybe with a bird theme. For which I could get the bird cupcake stands I mentioned in #4. And wear this ring. (A party which I would have to have AFTER we move out of Mille and Fille’s house…because they’re not “fancy party” people.)

9. Anything from the boygirlparty shop. Or EVERYTHING from their shop. But more importantly, these recipe cards.

I have a LOAD of recipes. It’s not even funny how many I have. I would LOVE these so I could write the important ones down and have them on something fancy to distinguish them from the sea of papers I have floating around my recipe box. (Which, for argument’s sake, is one of these. The 50 quart size.)

The second I start actually working on opening my cupcake shop, I’m contacting the owner of boygirlparty to see if she’d carry her recipe cards in my shop. That’s how much I adore them.

SO! In conclusion, I like stuff. And I hope there’s something shiny for me under the tree this year.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and Joyeux Kwanzaa to all, and now I need to go take a nap.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Megan
    Dec 09, 2010 @ 22:24:01

    Aww, thanks for loving my foot cream so much! 🙂 I adore your blog btw and I enjoyed reading this post (question, why are they about to kill Santa?). Plus, I am in full agreement with you on boygirlparty’s shop – I’ve been a fan for awhile. I gave some of her stuff as Christmas prezzies to my sister a couple years ago, in fact.


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